Posts Tagged ‘conflict’

207- Conflict Pearls

Oysters are filter feeders that suck in plankton through their gills to feed.

Once in a while, a parasite slips through and irritates the poor mollusk. The oyster coats the parasite in layers of nacre to protect itself, and after two years of hard work, a pearl is born.

In life, #conflict can play a similar role.

Although irritating, it allows us to build character, challenge our values and grow from the experiences – should we choose to take the time to work through them.

Avoiding conflict is not the goal. Growing from conflict is.


140- Design De-escalation

When it comes to avoiding #conflict with strangers, a simple #strategy is to be curious. It’s tough to stay mad at someone when you’re curious about them. Even better, if you can hold onto that sense of #curiosity for long enough, life will naturally send you in opposite directions making conflict impossible.

But avoiding conflict with friends, partners and family can be more challenging. Trauma, triggers, and accumulated resentment can blindside us, especially when we find ourselves in relationships when we feel safe.

We stand our ground more, push back a little harder, and both sides develop the expectation for the other to “know better.”

But recurring conflict is detrimental for relationships. The key is to develop processes and methodologies that empower both parties to de-escalate so that conversation can continue.

After all, ending a conflict is not the same as resolving one.